I Use a Rhyming Dictionary To Complete My Parodies

Parody Performed By: Skip Briggs

Original Song: "The Major General's Song" by Gilbert & Sullivan

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The original lyrics I wrote were specifically targeted to the group of parody writers who post their work on AmIRight.com. Skip Briggs altered the lyrics as shown here to make them suitable for a general audience.

I use a rhyming dictionary to complete song parodies
I know that some would think that I'm a writer with a brain disease
(But) I think that a tool designed to finish lines with greater ease
Should not be shunned if it can give my rhymes a greater expertise

(I'm) well aware when using it there's never any guarantees
(That) I will find a word that fits like honey fits with honey bees
But often when I find my writer's brain is in a rhyming freeze
I'll open up that book and there's a rhyme that fits as good as these

(He'll open up that book and there's a rhyme that fits as good as these)
(He'll open up that book and there's a word that rhymes with "japanese")
(He'll open up that book and there are rhymes in ones and twos and even threes)

I'm pretty good with meter and the margarine that's metaphor
I'll add alliteration 'cause it's always something I adore
But sometimes when I'm rhyming it becomes a complicated chore
To find a word that rhymes with that which finished up the line before

(Yes sometimes when he's rhyming it becomes a complicated chore)
(To find a word that rhymes with that which finished up the line before)

And sometimes it surprises me to learn there are so many rhymes
For words like acrobatic, incubation, chill, and even chimes
And my vocabulary keeps increasing each and every time
I use my rhyming dictionary to retrieve a word like "syme"

There's those who claim they'd rather have a case of compound STDs
Than use assistance when they write their pure and perfect parodies
And if you're one of those who doesn't like my rhyming strategies
You do not have to use them, you can write your lines the way you please

(You do not have to use them, you can write your lines the way you please)
(You do not have to use them, everybody that I've polled agrees)
(You do not have to use them, you can plagiarize a rhyme of B.I.G's)

Besides my printed copy there are sites out on the internet
That conjure up a rhyme so quick I never have to break a sweat
I pull them up and type in that I need a rhyme for "silhouette"
And quicker than a blink I get my choice of "debt" or "jet" or "wet"

Now I have learnt a lot of rhymes by using this quite helpful tool
It's just like diving deep into a rhyming-word filled swimming pool
And if you say that it's a crutch and proves that I am just a fool
I'll say that learning didn't end the day that I got out of school

(He'll say that learning didn't end the day that he got out of school)
(He'll say that you should live your life according to the golden rule)
(He'll say that if you take a look you just might think that it is pretty cool)

And now here in the final verse I'll say it's been a real delight
To tell you of the method that resolves my constant rhyming plight
Now all I have to do is find a way to deal with my stage fright
(And) conquor my sta-stuttering to make the song just come out right

(Yes, all he has to do is find a way to deal with his stage fright)
(And overcome his stuttering just so the song can come out right)