My Night in Vegas

Original Song: "Almost Paradise" by Mike Reno & Ann Wilson

Parody Performed By: Skip Briggs

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I thought that I would be the lucky one
I hit the Vegas strip
All ready to have fun
I'll play some craps and get a bunch of cash
I bet a lot of chips
The dice are in my grip
It's time to roll and be a millionaire

Uh-oh with that pair of dice
It seems I got twelve again
With that pair of dice
How will I ever win?
I try to roll a seven but I get snake eyes
Bloody dice

It seems I better find another game
I'm never giving up
I'll find a pot to claim
Hey over there I see someone dealing cards
But when I go join in
Well much to my chagrin
I'm dealt a bunch of nothing in my hand

Uh-oh got a pair of fives
I'm taking it on the chin
With a pair of fives
Why can't I ever win?
The dealer's got two sevens, and they outrank my
Pair of fives

I've had enough, I'm gonna win before I leave
So I sneak aces, aces from my sleeve

Then a pair of guys
Are tossing me out the door
Strong arm pair of guys
Say "don't come here no more"
I wound up bruised and battered by an oversized
Pair of guys
My oh my
Why oh why