Contagious (The Typhoid Mary Story)
Original Song: "Contagious" by Avril Lavigne
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Uh oh
Uh oh
She comes to town and gets work as a cook
She feeds her patrons everyday
They start thinkin' they've got stomach flu
And then she packs and moves away
With bacterial french fries
And epidemic apple pie
She will risk human life
Does she ever wonder why
She's so contagious
There's pathogens stirred in the stir fry
It's so delicious
So tasty you could die
Anytime
Uh oh
Uh oh
Then one day a stricken family
Employed a guy to check around
Found a cook who had a history
That's when he had it figured out
Tracked her down to the east side
The truth was right there in his file
He accused, she denied
Kept on cooking all the while
She's so contagious
She's serving Sam & Ella at nine
It's so audacious
C'mon it's time to dine
Plague-laden chicken wings
For you tonight
Tainted beans, virulent yams
Illness in each bite
She's so contagious
She thinks "hygiene" is greeting some guy
She gets her wages
And then she says goodbye
She's so contagious
She makes a killer boston cream pie
She's so infectious
That's why she's now confined
All the time