Barely Tan

Parody Performed By: Skip Briggs

Original Song: "Marianne" by The Four Seasons

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Barely tan (Fooooooey)
Barely tan
Barely tan (Not my plan)
Barely tan (Oooooooh where's my tan?)

Whoa-oa-oa here I am
On this beach again
I'll do anything
Not to be so white

I don't understand
Why my skin is bland
And I barely tan

No matter how much I roast
I stay as pale as a ghost
I'm catching lots of rays
Hoping they'll darken my days

I don't understand
In the surf and sand
I stay barely tan
Yes I'm barely tan
Always barely tan
Oh, I could fry in a pan
And never tan
(Never tan, never tan, never tan)

You see my big pale moon
Alabaster rear
Guess it could be worse
Could be crystal clear
Out in all this heat
I'm white as a sheet
Stayin' barely tan
Yes I'm barely tan
Always barely tan
Oh, I could live in Sudan
And never tan

Ivory (cause I never tan)
Pearly (never ever tan)
Snowy

Melanin
Very thin
In my skin
I can't win (aaaaaaahhhhh!)

Backup plan
In my hand
Spray-on tan
From a can

I was tan
'Til it ran
Now I am
Barely tan