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To All The Girls I've Loved Before

Parody Performed By: Gary Hermann

Original Song: "To All The Girls I've Loved Before" by Albert Hammond

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To all the girls I've loved before
The doctor says I've got a sore
It's been there all along
I may have done some wrong
To all the girls I've loved before

To all the girls I once caressed
You better go and get a test
What started with hello
Could now be causing woe
To all the girls I've loved before

I looked it up, so now I'm knowing
That if you ever came my way
You really should be H.M.O.- ing
It also wouldn't hurt to pray

To all the girls who shared my life
I hate to cause you any strife
My message won't take long
Please check inside your thong
If you're a girl I've loved before

To all the girls who cared for me
I've lived just like a busy bee
I took my task to heart
To pollinate a part
Of all the girls I've loved before

You should have planned on always "no" - ing
And telling me "put that away"
If you find any lesions showing
You'll know my love is here to stay

To all the girls I've loved before
It's something you just can't ignore
The evidence is strong
I gave infected schlong
To all the girls I've loved before

To all the girls I've loved before
I want you all to know the score
Because I came along
My virus may belong
To all the girls I've loved before